God Why? - Prayer
Im sorry God but im broken inside and its your fault.
I had and enjoyed having joy, love, peace, appreciations and understanding for everything living on earth. These qualities ran through my veins. My character and personality showed that with ease. I was very congenial. Everyone felt welcomed and respected around me. It was hard and took effort for me to be cruel and mean towards others. Ive always been diplomatic and just and caring to the thoughts and needs of others. "Removing oneself from the equation" is what I tried to live by.
I was and still am a good person with a good heart and soul. I was a good and fair friend. The thing that made my life worth living was love for others. I enjoyed making people happy.
Now I dont enjoy life.
I am ruined from pain from heartbreak from my first love and my first real friend. He was everything to me, my sunshine. and you took that away. He is a horrible person for his actions. i have forgiven him and only wish the best for him, yet a small part of me wishes him to suffer for what he has done to me.
The hurt he caused all could of been avoided if he had just told me what was going on with him. Ive been worried sick about him, im losing weight, cant sleep, hair falling out, no libido, and cant stop crying due to worrying and missing him. He vanished and because you made me a good person, i have decided to wait for his return because that is the right thing to do, at least i thought. But my body and mind cant take anymore.
My spirit is dead. Ive come to realize that he is not to blame for his actions. God, you are to blame.
They say things happen for a reason.
Why have you killed me in spirit and forbidden me to life with no love, no future of love, and no want to ever love again?
Im upset now god. im upset with you. because you are not bringing him back into my life. You've toyed with me enough..
Im sorry, but youve done this to me and I dont see why.