Healing and Restoration
Please pray for me I'm struggling with heartache and loneliness. I loved a girl very much and we were going to get married. She ended things between us months ago but I just feel so empty and broken now. Like I still love her, but I know she doesn't love me. I feel like part of me died when she left... like she took my heart with her and I feel hollow now. I also feel tremendous guilt because while we were dating we sinned... we didn't remain sexually pure because we thought we were going to be together forever. But then one day she said she didn't love me anymore and that she wanted to 'live life' and she didn't want to be tied down to me and she was happy being on her own. So on top of the heartache and emptiness I'm feeling I have this guilt from the sin I committed... and I feel like I don't deserve to ever find love even though I desperately want too. I feel I don't deserve a girl now because I didn't keep myself pure, and even though I've prayed I feel so far from God and broken. Please pray for me that God will restore me to Him and bring me peace first. And then bring healing to my broken heart even though its my own fault for making foolish choices. And that God would help me be a good man and that He would please bless me with someone that will love me as much as I love her. I have so much love in my heart and I want to be special to someone again... and to share my life with a girl and make her feel happy and beautiful and loved in a way she has never known. I'm just so broken right now please pray for me that God will restore my joy and hope and fix the mess I've made of my life. I confess my sins and I want to live a pure and holy life. I struggle with memories of what it was like with my ex... and I fight to keep my thoughts pure but it is difficult because those memories of being together with her when I felt loved and accepted by her in such a deep way seem to be all that make the pain stop when I can't sleep. But I don't want to think about sinful things so it puts me in constant turmoil. I need peace, forgiveness, healing and restoration. And either for this girl to come back into my life, or for God to bring me someone new who will be gracious to forgive my past and make a new life with me and love me and never leave me.